“Are you alright?” asked my friend when she heard the news of my grandmother passing away suddenly last morning and I didn’t heard her question the first time as my mind was playing all of my memories with her so when she asked me again, I simply replied, no. Everyone was saying really plain things like, this is the way how universe works or if a person is born then he has to die someday and more things about balance of life which were like whispers to my ears. I was only thinking about how people really deal with this kind of feeling. I thought about all those people who might have lost many of their loved ones and are still finding some reasons to go on and live fully. So when my mind was replaying her memories, I asked myself- who am I without her? Maybe lost for some time now. She used to wish many things for me, like- a successful career, a beautiful life where I am strong and full of life just like her, a healthy diet and other beautiful things. Her life was amazing, a life full of ups and downs, she lost many people during her journey of life but at the end of it, her face glowed with gratefulness. After we lose our close ones, first we deal with the fact that they are no longer coming back. Then we become paranoid that anything can happen to anyone and life is very uncertain. After this phase, comes a more real and bitter one, accepting their constant absence and resolving to move on and at that very moment, we become stronger than before. We suddenly realize our true strength and start to find ourselves again. We start little by little by first laughing at small things, then enjoying the magic of sunsets, embracing each and every moment of our life and simply resolving to live only at the present moment instead of our past. So the answer to this question “Who do we really become after losing our loved ones?” is- We become stronger, a person who smiles in front of all the hardships and gets through it every time. We find our true self after getting lost in the abyss just like a vagabond finally finding a place to settle down and grow old in it, a place to call home.